In Soviet Russia Cars Drive You

I am sure you all have heard about the meteor that almost hit the earth.  I am sure you all saw the footage of it from Russia.  It was awe-inspiring and amazing.... and all that.  But the meteor coming close (not really) to hitting the earth buried the real story. 

Living in Russia is like playing a real-life video game.

You see most of the footage of the meteor was captured by dash board cameras from Russians.  Why are there dash-board cameras in Russia, you ask.  It seems that there are a lot of corrupt cops in Russia and the best protection from being falsely arrested and thrown in the gulag is to have evidence that you were just minding your business driving your beets to the local borscht making factory when you were pulled out of your car by KGB agents and forced to dance the Cossack dance while said agents threw matryoshka dolls at you. 

You may have noticed that my last example shows that I know nothing about Russian culture.  I am sure it is a varied tapestry of experiences that I unfairly reduced to the most obvious caricatures that I have gleaned from television.  That being said, Russia is seriously fucked up.

Take a look at the compilation of videos captured from Russian car cams in the following link.

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=50141258n

Did you see that?  There was gun shootings, crazy car crashes, helicopters buzzing by and an airplane landing on the freeway.  Life in Russia is obviously way cooler than all of the Die Hard movies put together.  It is no wonder that Russia has banned adoptions to the United States.  They are afraid of giving them the next generation of action superheroes.  Now I know that the 'occurances' that were taped will likely harm some babies, but those that survive to adulthood are inevitably the next  John McClane or Martin Riggs.  You have to look at the silver lining.  Given what I know about superheroes from comics, Chernobyl must have resulted in at least one superhuman that the Russian government has kept secret and who will ultimately be used to gain global supremacy. 

Now I know that it is probably true that if there were dashboard cameras on every car in Canada we could probably film some crazy shit too.  But, we generally do not fear our police and as such we don't film everything and no one knows about the crazy shit we go through on a day-to-day basis.  

Because of our trust our legacy is lost.

If we fear more, we will record more.  If we record more we will see more of the bad shit that happens to others.  If we see more of this, we will fear more. 

I for one am investing in dashboard cameras.

The reason why I did it

I, like so many Canadians, watched the Superbowl last night.  It was amazing.  But, like other Canadians, I am now going to be arrested because I am going to have to try and kill the lead actress from CTV's "Motive".

Normally the commercials are the best part of the Superbowl. This is only true in America. In Canada, every second commercial was for Motive which was (as we were informed) airing after the Superbowl.

It started off ok.  There was an ad for Motive.  I was mildly intrigued.  Then the ad aired again.  And again.  And agian. 

Then there was a power outage during the game and the ad aired approximately 1000 more times.  It slowly drove me insane.  I begged the TV to stop.  But it just kept going.  It kept taunting me.   I slowly started to see that the show was secretly the work of the devil. 

As far as I can tell while other shows ask who, what, where and when - Motive dares to ask the question why?

So I have a couple why questions for it:

Why would you think that exploring motive is a new idea when literally every crime show does this already? I mean the whole ending of every show is always the explanation of why something happened.  Have you watched CSI? Law and Order?

Why would a cop not care about the who, what, where and how?  I suspect that real cops don't give a shit why something happens as long as they find out who did what to who. 

I purposefully left the channel on and waited for Motive to start and immediately turned it off the moment it came on so that whoever watches viewing habits would know that I disapprove.  

I suspect no one noticed. 

They were to busy learning from good commercials that only aired in America why God made farmers or learning about a goat who eats Doritos.  I didn't learn about any of those things.  I learned that Canadians make horrible shows and have horrible promos for them. 

Why am not surprised?