What I didn't realise is the amount of kids shows I would watch after becoming a parent. You see my genes are strong and my son also loves TV. Except he has terrible taste in shows. I figured we would be watching the Wire together. Instead, we watch Bubble Guppies. OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
Now all of this repeated viewing has taught me somethings. First, I now realise that the Sun is indeed a beautiful Sun and it goes around and around us. That said I am starting to see the hidden stories that exist in each of these shows. I also am noticing that there is serious need for some fact checking.
Allow me to now pass judgment on the following:
Bubble Guppies
- Lobsters doctors should not sing about the 'bones inside them'. Lobsters do not have bones. They have an exo-skeletons.
- These fish live under water. Yet nothing behaves as it would underwater. My son is not going to understand fluid dynamics.
- Why the hell is Nonny always frowning? Is it because he has glasses and Molly (his crush) doesn't give a second look, instead preferring all look and no substance Gil?
- Are you telling me that Goby (the only Black bubble guppy) is not on the Fishketball team? I don't buy it.
- To quote the joker: "Where does he get those marvelous toys". Max has the highest tech toys possible. He has like remote control blimps and rockets with real fire. I am pretty sure these do not exist.
- Where are there parents? I mean Max and Ruby live by themselves in a giant house. The only adult involved in their lives is their Grandmother. I have a theory on this. Keep reading.
- What is up with Ruby? Sometimes she is very nice to Max, but often she is the biggest bitch possible. She tells Max to shut up and leave her alone when all Max wants to do is let her that t her chameleon has escaped. She just doesn't listen. I am very troubled by her bi-polar nature. I think this explains the lack of parents. I am 99% sure that Ruby (in a manic episode) killed her parents when they tried to take her out of the cult she was in (bunny scouts). On the advice of the leader she offed them and has been taking care of Max ever since. I am pretty sure we will see all of this in a series of flashbacks at the end of the season in a huge cliffhanger. Max's word for the episode will be 'murder'.
- What the hell is wrong with this show? Why are the characters so sexist (at one point the lone female firefighter is told to stay in the kitchen while the men go fight the fires).
- What is up with Norman? His voice is the most annoying thing ever. He also literally sets a fire every episode. This is a small town. This kid is just torching a building everyday. Do they not have juvenile detention in England?
- I think that the fire station is funding Norman to start fires so that there will be no questioning of why this small town afford a fire station and a rescue boat and a helicopter. It makes no economic sense otherwise. I also pretty sure Norman is Fireman Sam's illegitimate child.
- Do you all see that Mr. Topenhat is running a totalitarian regime in which the engines are caught under his thumb and made to be useful or suffer the consequences? The only one who understands the injustice of it all is Toby. But he's too square to do anything about it. If only Thomas would open his eyes and become the leader he was meant to be and start the revolution.
- Also, Thomas should totally shunt Emily. Am I right?
- There is nothing strange or weird about this show at all. This show is very true to life and in no way will cause my child to suffer the equivalent of an acid flashback when he is older. Way to go Quebec.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Have something to tell me? Go ahead!