I had to come back...Hawaii 5-0 made me do it

Ok - so it has been a long time.  Yeah.  I know.  This is awkward in the same way that meeting a friend that you haven't seen in several years is awkward.  Neither one of you called, emailed or IMed (whatever that is).  You are not really friends anymore...but you still remember the good times.

So today is a lot like that.  Let's remember the good times.  Remember Chinese bun lady.  Remember Jesusween. 

I had to come back because I saw on television the end of entertainment as we know it.  It was a commercial for Hawaii 5-0.  

That's right - Hawaii 5-0.  I know, you don't watch it.  Nobody watches it - yet is is popular.  The only thing I know about it is it has Boomer and the "not Ari" agent from Entourage in it.  It is the epitome of meaningless. 

Until it changed the game.

This week Hawaii 5-0 is letting the audience vote on how an episode will end.  The vote is live.  Literally, they will start the episode and then open the voting and the audience will be able to decide which of three pre-determined endings will air. 

This is groundbreaking. 

We the mere viewers are now able to create content, just by voting.  This is truly revolutionary.  But not in the way you might think.

Stay with me - I have not gone insane.  I know this is a stupid show trying to hook you in.  I know none of the endings matter and that choosing between three pre-determined endings is no big deal. I know that this is show that already has signaled that it has no original ideas by not being original in the first place (as a reboot) and now can't even bother to make the creative decision on how an episode should end. 

But they have advertised the hell out of it.  They have said they will choose the ending that has the most votes. 

They have made a mistake.  They have given us an out.

I have one small request for 2013.  No one votes for Hawaii 5-0.  If we don't vote they can't air anything.  They will have to cancel the show.   That is the rule.  If they let the audience decide we can decide that we don't want anything.

Now I know we could have done that anyway by not watching.  But let's be honest.  If it is on TV we will watch.  What we can refuse to do is actively participate in Hawaii 5-0.  We can do that much. 

This could be the precedent setter.  We can make our stand here.  If we don't vote for this then maybe they won't run "the Voice" anymore.  Eventually, if we all stop voting on TV they will not run those annoying little lines on the American presidential debates to gauge public reaction. 

Let us all stand together in apathy and do nothing. 

I have always had a dream.  I wish that I would go to a sold out show of Peter Pan.  The play would go as normal until Tinker Bell dies and Peter Pan turns to the audience and asks the audience to say "I believe in fairies" to bring her back to life.  The theater is hushed and quiet, caught up in the 4th wall breaking enormity of the moment, until a small boy no more than six stands on his seat.  He is wearing pajamas because he is going to fall asleep in the car on the way home.  He is holding a teddy bear.  The audience turns to see him and he says in his falsetto wavering voice:

"let the bitch die". 

I don't believe in fairies and I don't believe in Hawaii 5-0.  Let it die.