With the headline: "Who masterminded the failed attack on Bulgarian politician?"
I was like: "the head of the Bulgarian Society for the Legally Blind" or (BSLB to the uninitiated). A gunman was literally able to get up on stage point a gun to the head of this politician and the attack "failed". What the hell happened?
We are left with only one possible outcome. The Bulgarian politician is a robot who was unable to be harmed from a straight-on bullet to the head. He, like the Austrian Schwarzenegger, is a robot from the future sent back to either enslave or protect us for future robot warlords.
The newspaper story said that it was "a gas gun", but we know that the future all powerful robot warlords control the media. I mean "gas gun"? Really? How gullible do they think we are? I have never heard of a gas gun and I have heard of Robot Warlords (see "Terminator", "Terminator 2", Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines" or "Short Circut"*)
(* If you really think Johnny 5 was a good robot you have not caught the undertones of evil that are contained in every act he performs. Think about the way he says "John 5 still alive". While he may not say "...to rape your women and destroy your civilization", it is certainly implied)
People we need to organise now - we must begin to stop the mechanical Belgians from recognizing their manifest destiny of control over us and every other biological thing on Earth. We must now boycott:
Chocolate
Beer
Potato Fries
the Saxophone (invented by Adolphe Saxe)
Hercule Poirot
Who am I kidding? While I might be able to avoid those things I could never, ever, ever resist the siren song of Tintin comics which were penned by a Belgian.
I, for one, welcome our new robot overlords.
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