Never give it back!

So Sunday is the day we all look forward to every year... the day we get our hour back.

Every year I look forward in anticipation to the day where I get my hour back.  I wait with anticipation for what I will do with my extra time.  Will I go out and help the homeless?  Will I read to the blind? Will I write the next great novel?  Usually I sleep.

This year the answer is different.  I will be up at 4:00 am in the morning.  You see the extra hour is amazing when you have a conception of time.  Unfortunately, my 10 month old is currently waking at 5:00 am and now will wake at 4:00 am.  I hope he learns a sense of time soon or I am going to be a real life zombie.

Putting that aside for a moment, I think we can all agree that in general getting the extra hour is awesome.  Giving it back is the annoying part.  If I used to love the day when we got the hour - there was no day I hated more than the day it was all taken away from me.  Who will read to the blind now, I would shout to the world in anger.  The question becomes what do we do?  Do we get rid of daylight saving time all together and lose the gaining of the extra hour or do we keep the joy of gaining the extra hour and live with the misery of having to give it back.

I opt for a third option which I call the Greek option in honour of that poor failing country.  Take but never give it back.

The plan is simple.  Each year we take our extra hour.  But we never give it back.  It is brilliant and has no drawbacks what-so-ever.

Well...there are at least two drawbacks.  One is not so serious.  The other is probably the end of the world as we know it.

The first drawback is that over time we would be living in a world where day is night and night is day.  Each year we would gain an hour.  This would not be a problem at first.  However, there would literally be a decade or so where we were living at night and sleeping during the day.   This would seem like a big problem, but probably is not that serious.  They already do this in Alaska and Alaska is undeniably the coolest place on earth.  Having to live through this time (which would invariably be called either the dark ages or the end of days) would give future generations something to rally around and a sense of purpose.  It would also spur industries to develop all kinds of special gear to help us through.  Right now we need jobs.  Imagine how much jobs would be created by the flashlight on the head industry alone. 

Also, vampires would love it and we all know vampires are cool.

The more serious drawback is that it would affirm the fact that we have complete control over time.  This is a big problem.  If we could just give ourselves an hour and it worked it would not take too long for everyone to discover that we could just give ourselves more time.  We would literally be immortal.  If we just gave ourselves a day each day we would never age. 

I have checked and this is totally how it works. 

This would wreak havoc on our world as people would not age.  Too many people would be born and food supplies would dwindle.  Babies would never grow up.  It would be chaos. 

In fact, because the baby boomers out number the younger people they would start voting that we should give ourselves two days instead of one each day and they would start to grow younger.  This would cause people who are younger to eventually be unborn.  This mass age genocide would be totally ignored by the youth hungry baby boomers trying to escape the icy hand of death.  Eventually, we would be left with a world where the perpetually young maintain their hold on society by reversing time as they see fit.  This is a probably a bad thing.

So I guess I will just wake up on Monday at 4 am and say a little prayer that I get a little older each day even if it means I have to give an hour back to the world here or there.